gilmore girls: a year in the life
Heyyyy there guys! Long time, no blogging. I know I promised to write once a month but it looks like I turned out to be a liar. Actually what had happened was I got distracted by 300+ episodes of CSI (and a movie). Now I should be embarrassed by that but you know what? I'm not, probably because after 15 seasons of crime scene investigating, I have my murder degree which means I can kill all of you and get away with it. Now obviously this post is about Gilmore Girls: A Year in the Life and not CSI but will there be a future post detailing my inexplicable draw to overacting and ridiculously contrived plot points aka CSI? (Las Vegas, I do have some standards. Not that Miami or New York garbage) Short answer? No. Long Answer? Nooooooooooo. I don't know why I watched it except that I did and I can't even say I hated it because that would be a lie (you don't watch 15 seasons and a movie of a show you hate). It's good for what it is, harmless, brain relaxing, popcorny entertainment with a side of murder. It wasn't something I had to think about or dissect each scene (though there were dissections, ayyo!), it was something I could pop on and not think about, and I really needed something like that. Plus I didn't have anything I really was looking forward to watching when I first started it. But meanwhile, because it took a gazillion years to watch 15 seasons of an hour long show, eventually a million shows I did want to watch all came out and then I was like super behind. Why do I do this to myself?
So I watched CSI and I won't be writing about it but real quick, let me drop a few lines, The first couple seasons? Solid. Grissom is the best to watch, even if he does have some stupid side story with the most annoying character on the show (Sara Sidle) but then Warrick dies and Grissom leaves, and Morpheus steps in but he cannot fill the Grissom shaped void left behind and the show really was not that enjoyable to watch any more. I wanted to get at least as far as Ted Danzen because I heard he was on there and I really like him so I wanted to check it out and boy, I was not disappointed! He was exactly the jolt that show needed to continue. Him and Elizabeth Shue were a complete joy to watch and I easily made it through the last couple seasons without any more pain. Sorry Morpheus.
OKAY BACK TO MY GIRLS...
So I'm only writing about the new Netflix season that was released last November, the previous 7 seasons are just too much for me to write about. I watched it when it aired originally (up until season 4 or maybe 5) and so my thoughts on the show are all garbled with my adolescent hormonal craziness and can't be considered reliable or coherent. I was a mess back then (lol back then, like I'm not a mess now, I just watched 15 seasons of CSI, I shouldn't be trusted to make any decisions anymore). I watched the new season/movie/reboot A Year in the Life when it first aired and then rewatched it while writing it because honestly besides a handful of things, I really didn't remember it. My brain is like a DVR completely full of CSI episodes, I have no room in there anymore outside my murder degree. Anyways as I've spent the last 15 years in love with the girls and I've watched the original show easily 6 or 7 times, I'm going to give them the time and respect they deserve and do each episode individually. This is gonna be a long one guys, you might want to settle in.
WINTER
First things first, where the FUCK was the opening credits? The little voice over of little moments from the TV show was cute but GG has the best opening credits. Nowadays TV shows don't even have theme songs or opening credits so I was really looking forward to these, and it's weird that they didn't have that with this reboot. It always got me amped, I sang with it every time (where you leeeeead, I will follow) and it didn't truly feel like GG started without Carole King's voice crooning to me. (Also, the little voiceover of all the moments from the show was very reminiscent of the Veronica Mars movie, I wonder if they took that idea and ran with it) Okay so as much as I bitched that there's no opening credit song, no Carole King, the last little voiceover moment from the series before the word "Winter" popped up on the screen, "I smell snow..." gave me goosebumps.
What I loved right from the beginning is that there was no easing back into the show. The first scene is the girls, meeting up at the gazebo and a mile per minute bantering and when Rory takes a deep breath at the end of it and says "that felt good", she took the words right out of my mouth. My girls are back, oh how I've missed them!
And oh how I've missed Stars Hollow! (PS is it just me or is Mainstrasse just a trashy version of Stars Hollow, with you know, more heroin? I think it's because of the little twinkle lights) It was nice to see some familiar faces too, Miss Patty, Kirk, the town troubadour, shit (and I'm going to get some flack for this) but even Lorelai's ex Jason Stiles. And his entry into the show was not contrived or forced at all, she ran into him at her father's funeral and had some quick banter with Lorelai and went on his way. It was organic and I didn't mind it. Something I didn't fucking care for was the whole "Ooober" thing with Kirk. I get it, Kirk's weird and he does weird shit and yes he'd probably do that but why did it go on for so long and why did everyone have to keep saying it? Whenever everything else seemed so effortless being dropped in (what Rory has been up to, her living situation, Lorelai and Luke's relationship, the whole town tour), Kirk constantly bringing up his fucking annoying fake car thing was just a little jarring. We get it, it's 2016 now and it's like Uber but it's Kirk, just stop okay?
But let's talk about the real gem of the show, the other Gilmore girl who doesn't quite get enough love, if you ask me, Emily Gilmore. Boy has she changed and yet she hasn't? Well one thing that's different is the fact that she has the same maid for the entire series, and not just that, she pretty much just adopts the whole family. Also, she's mad at Lorelai, that's not new, but it's a justifiable anger and that's kinda new. Lorelai was fucking selfish and mean and Emily has no fucking time to sugar coat it anymore (lol like she ever did before?). She just straight called her out on all her bulldozing ways, Lorelai has to get her own way or she won't fucking do it at all, and that's always been a flaw of hers. It was harder to see in the earlier seasons of the show because she struggled so much but as she started to succeed and achieve her goals, like opening the inn and having more money, her lack of compromise with Luke or with Rory or with Emily seemed incredibly childish and dickish. Thank God for Emily dropping some truths on her. I especially liked how she was telling Lorelai like oh go back to your weird little town where you're so beloved and tell everyone how I'm such a bitch and you've been so wronged. And yeah, that's kinda how Lorelai is. Don't get me wrong, I fucking love Lorelai but she definitely lives in this little bubble where she's perfect and everyone who is mean to her is the devil. It's a character flaw, it's frustrating, but it's nice that it's being called out on. Then the goddess known as Emily Gilmore goes even further to be like WTF Rory? Why are you being an irresponsible piece of shit? And girlfriend only knew the half of it...
Because not only has Rory leveled up in being obnoxious but she's like just a downright shitty person. Cheating on Paul (Pete? Pablo? I kind of love the joke that no one remembers him) with the shittiest bag of all shit bags, Logan Huntzberger. I hate Logan and not just because, gun to my head, if I had to choose I'd choose "Team Jess" but because of all the shitty things he's said and done to her and it's fucking frustrating to see someone actively choose shitty people in their life. I know he was written in to be a reflection of Lorelai and Christopher's relationship (more on that later) but for all his faults, Christopher was an absent father yes, but he wasn't actively shitty to Lorelai. I think it's a flawed comparison. Anyways, so what shitty thing does Logan do to Rory? It's a quick remark but it reminded me of when Rory dropped out of Yale and he said oh my father doesn't know how to treat people and he shouldn't have said those things to you. He never defended her or supported her or told her she was a great writer and fuck his father for saying anything otherwise. Maybe she's not a great writer and his father was right, fuck if I know, but your boyfriend should be behind you 100%. He took it that her feelings were hurt by his father and he didn't like that, sure that's fine, but the thing is that it's bigger than that. Her whole fucking life goals were shot down right in front of her. He should've been more like fuck my father's opinion, you're talented, you will be able to find a way to do what you want, you'll get through this because you're smart and driven. But he didn't say that and he totally enabled her to almost throw everything she worked for away because he's an uncaring piece of shit. ANYWAYS so along those same lines he says something to her when they're in his apartment in London about how she's a great writer and she goes oh you must be in a good mood. Like he normally doesn't tell her she's a great writer or encourage her goals in life and the fact that he did means that he's in a good mood. Yeahhhh... so he's still an unsupportive twatwaffle. Go figure. But damn, he's a fine looking unsupportive twatwaffle. I didn't see it before but I see it now, the past 10 years have been kind to you Logan Huntzberger.
Also, is it just me or is Lane living in Sookie's old house?? Because that's pretty fucking meta.
SPRING
So Spring was definitely a step back after a strong debut after, what was it, 10 years? Though it did introduce some good storylines, it introduced some of the worst storylines so there's that too. I think it's because ONE person (Ahem, Amy) was much better writing the characters than another person (I'm talking about you, Daniel...). Where the first episode mostly caught us up on where the characters were after all these years apart from us, this episode mostly gets the plot into motion, kind of. There were parts that were too long, that should've been edited either out or down and because they weren't it was weird and awkward. I'm specifically thinking of the town hall meeting. Normally those meetings are pretty short (from what we see) and relate to the plot in some way and this time it just seemed to be like oh hey, isn't Taylor goofy? So is Babette, and the newspaper stand guy, what a wacky group of people we got here, aren't we just quirky?? I think maybe 4 hour and half long episodes may have been too much, it seems like they didn't have enough story to cover all of it or maybe they did, but they couldn't get the required actors for that story for enough time to actually tell it and so there's these scenes that are just there and have no real purpose.
So first, let me get my Rory rant out of the way. It's so hard to be sympathetic to her. She's become this completely unlikable character, completely unrecognizable from the beginning of the show. Don't get me wrong, she was always a little terrible but that has grown exponentially. Remember when her and Dean broke up the first time and she refused to cry and get upset about it until that party and her mom found her on the couch with a gallon of ice cream like I'm ready to wallow now? My heart went out to that girl, then she became the girl that slept with a married man and then the girl who throws away her entire life because one person didn't fall down and worship at her feet, and now? Now she's the girl sleeping with another girl's fiance, while she has a dude, and thinks the world still owes her everything. Her book with River Song falls through, she tries halfheartedly to do a story for a big publishing company who are giving her a chance, and then she shows up completely unprepared for an interview for some up and coming blog-news-trend-website-thing and dismayed that they expected her to impress THEM. Didn't they know? She's Rory fucking Gilmore, she wrote one article for the New Yorker one time and she EXPECTED this job. How dare they get HER hopes up! She didn't even want this crap level job in the first place, she was LOWERING herself to them, mere mortals. You know I almost felt sorry for her when she was freaking out after having sex with the wookie (OH and shut up about how terrible it is that he was dressed up like a wookie, not every person you sleep with can be the heir to a newspaper fortune, you princess bitch), even though she cheated on her forgettable boyfriend AGAIN, the whole "I'm drowning, I'm not as successful as I want to be, my life isn't going the way I planned, I can't hold it all together anymore" feeling she has is super relateable. I've been there. I get that. So I almost felt sorry for her, until immediately after that she goes on that interview and just becomes the embodiment of every negative millenial article ever. Man, fuck her and her entitled ass.
One thing I did like, though I thought it could've been done better, was the whole therapy storyline with Lorelai and Emily. If there's any two people in the world that need therapy, it's those bitches. But it was dropped kind of suddenly, after teasing us with THAT LETTER, the horrible letter that Emily says that Lorelai sent her and never spoken of again. WTF was in that letter? What was the point of bringing UP the letter if you were never going to explain it? That's some half assed writing if you ask me. And then to have Lorelai lie about going to therapy to Luke seemed really out of character. Well for now-Lorelai. Past-Lorelai probably would've lied because she was always weird about stuff but this Lorelai, she's been in this relationship with Luke now for 9 years and you can't be doing that AND lying about shit. So it just seemed weird. And I didn't understand why they just dropped the whole thing so quickly, that could've been the new "Friday night dinner" thing and gone on for the rest of the episodes, "Tuesday morning therapy" (Jesus, those ladies reeeeally need it too). I just felt like that was such a rich opportunity to explore their relationship outside of the OMG you had a baby at 16 (which when Emily brought that up in therapy, I was like are you fucking kidding me? Get a new fucking song- that was directed at the writers, not our goddess Emily). But I suppose this is all about these 3 ladies all going on their independent journeys and finding strength alone so they can support each other. Or some shit.
I liked this whole storyline too with Lorelai and Michel and the inn and possibly him growing out of it and maybe her growing out of it. That's what made her open up the Dragonfly Inn in the first place, she outgrew that other inn whose name I'm blanking on and I realize I can just google it but I don't feel like it but it burnt down and you know the one. She took on opening her own business and succeeded and needs a new challenge, so I thought that was a welcome new storyline and I was really excited to see where it goes from here.
Another shining moment in this episode was our lord and savior, Paris Gellar. She is dressed to kill and when she slammed the door shut with her high heeled foot, I decided to name my first born after her. No regrets, girlfriend has flawless hair. Can I please just be her?
SUMMER
So we've never really seen summer in Stars Hollow and the reason for that is because Stars Hollow in the summer fucking sucks, or at least Daniel Palladino's interpretation of it does. This episode was on season 7 level terribleness, and not the episode where Luke punches Chris in the face, more like Lorelai gets married in Paris or her singing Whitney Houston. I know that's a big accusation but it's just how I feel in my heart, I'm not going to have a lot of nice things to say about this one guys.
Well let's just jump right into the mini musical nightmare we experienced. They literally played 4 complete songs, totaling 10 minutes of just straight musical, nothing adding to the plot, just Stars Hollow people being fucking wAcKy. That does NOT include the 7 minutes discussing the musical, and making a pledge, and the whole joke that everyone loves it but Lorelai didn't. OH and Carole King got up and sang this song that she wrote and everyone is like no that's not good, GET IT?? Because Carole King is a REAL artist and that song IS good so everyone IS DUMB for liking the musical. I literally kept track of how long the whole thing was because I remember thinking the first time I watched it "OMG this won't end, please tell me this is ending, how is this still going on, am I dead, is this purgatory, no this must be hell, how is this still going on?" I thought maybe I was being dramatic and it was only like 3 minutes long. So the little pledge beforehand started at minute 37, the first song started at minute 39, the last part of the musical ended at minute 49, and then they discussed it until minute 54. I'm not being dramatic, that was 17 minutes of complete nonsense. This is EXACTLY what I was talking about before about them either not having enough story to fill up all these episodes or having to substitute filler shit like this because they couldn't get the actors for the story. I genuinely hope to God it's the latter because I know it was difficult to get all these people back together with all their various projects etc but it very well may be the former. That depresses me. But I guess some may argue that the musical was necessary because it was the new song at the end (that song is not included with the original 17 minutes, mind you) that was the catalyst for Lorelai's decision to do "Wild" (the book, not the movie). I don't think that excuses 17 minutes of nonsense. That could've EASILY been edited down. There was just not enough story, ugh.
So onto Rory and her obnoxious entitled piece of shit ass. She's just a wreck right now and anytime someone tries to throw her a bone she bites their head off because she's just so much above everyone. The Stars Hollow Gazette is closing down because print is dead and so is the former editor or something and Rory is aghast! So she begrudgingly signs up to keep it running and pretty much sulks the whole time. Didn't you guys know, she got a journalism degree from YALE, she writes REAL articles about REAL things and fuck us if we don't get it. And for someone who previously ran a paper before and is crazy organized, she was a fucking disaster. Not realizing that someone would need to deliver the papers? Has her head gotten so big that she forgets the most basic things? Has her love affair with Logan, heir to a newspaper empire, made her completely disassociate that there are other people in the newspaper business who matter too, like the fucking paperboy? And yes, what about Logan? She freaks out because his FIANCE moved in with him and she's supposed to visit but now she has to stay in a hotel like a proper slutfaced mistress. Meanwhile, she's still dating what's his face but yet she's all mad because Logan is with another girl. How dare he be with his fiance, I'm perfect Rory! I can treat people like shit but they can't treat me that way! Now, I know it's more complicated than that, that their relationship has spanned years and there is a lot of complex feelings there but there is right and there is wrong. Both of them are acting like shitbags, hey! Maybe they do deserve each other! Sensing Rory is making bad life decisions, Jess enters stage right. He pops in and steers her into an idea that actually captivates her. Steer isn't the right word, more like straight up told her what to do. Jess is like why don't you write something that you do care about, what's the most important thing about you, what has shaped you as a person, Rory sits there crosseyed and drooling like I dunno Jess I'm a big dum dum what should I write about? And Jess is like you and your mom, it should start when you are 16 and span 7 years and then jump up to present day, how about this for a name "Gilmore Girls"? This big push from Jess really solidifies to me that while Logan is supposed to be Rory's Christopher, Jess is her Luke (though NO ONE IS LUKE BUT LUKE OKAY?). And while like I said earlier, gun to my head, I'm #TeamJess, I didn't care for the fact that Jess told her what to write. I mean, is she that dense that she couldn't think of it herself? SHE WENT TO YALE. So she brings the idea to Lorelai and thus begins the biggest, childish fight either of them have ever had, and that is definitely saying something.
(Though real quick before I move on to Lorelai, let me rant about the stupid fucking 30 something club. For one, it was annoying. For two, did Daniel Palladino just read a bunch of articles about negative stereotypes about millenials and then write this show? He seems to have some deep seated hatred towards my generation. "Oh they move back home and go bowling and love EVERYTHING by Paul Thomas Anderson, and they all have moustaches and are completely interchangeable and their mommies have to hold their hand and check their resume because the big bad world out there is just so so scary". I mean he's really the one that doubled down on making Rory the fucking most miserable priviledged bitch on the entire east coast. That's quite an accomplishment. I mean seriously, what underemployed 30 something at Starbucks shit in his coffee?)
Where was I? Oh Lorelai and Rory fighting in the graveyard. So... that was weird. It seemed really kinda random. Like Lorelai is really going to get that bent out of shape because Rory wants to write a book about their life together? First off, Rory hasn't completed a single thing yet so who's to say that she would even complete the book in the first place? And if she does complete it, maybe no one will publish it. And if it is published, that doesn't mean anyone will read it. I mean shit, they are all just assuming this is going to be some instant best seller aren't they? And she's always been so proud of their life together and the world that she brought her daughter up in, this need for super duper privacy is just... random. She's like I've always been very protective of what I tell people about myself. Nooo you are protective of what you tell your mom. You pretty much tell everyone else anything. In fact, that was a constant plot driver in the series, you telling strangers all about your life and your mom finding your shit out from a third party. That was like the plot of a fourth of the episodes, so I really just didn't get the whole fight. Maybe someone else can explain it to me better. Maybe I'm the dum dum. And Lorelai is being a total unsupportive bitch to her mom. I get it, her mom is hard on her and she can be difficult to love but Lorelai does love her so why is she being so shitty? Emily is sleeping in until noon, staying home, not doing anything, clearly going through a hard time and the only person helping her out is the Gypsy-maid and her family (oh the irony.... wait is that irony? I don't think I ever really understood what irony was. Is that ironic? Is ironic even a word, it looks weird now that I've typed it. Anyways...). Also, it really didn't seem like Lorelai to hate on Emily for maybe finding a new dude. I mean, I do get it, it's her mom and she had been with her dad for 50 years, but remember the episode where they wore the Dirty Trollop lipstick? Did Daniel Palladino even watch this show?
Here's a last few random thoughts, I kinda love Luke being a lifeguard and OF COURSE he kicked everyone out of the pool for not following the rules, Luke is so great! Michel leaving is very sad but understandable and I like that whole storyline and that upheaval for Lorelai but I shall miss him. I hated the secret bar, that was fucking stupid. It felt like that was created entirely just so Lorelai and Michel would have a place to have that conversation. Stars Hollow would never have a secret bar!
FALL
How the hell did we go from Summer, one of the worst episodes in the entire series, to Fall, one of the best? I'll tell you how, it's Amy Sherman-Palladino. She IS Gilmore Girls. She wrapped up these 4 mini movies-TV series, just perfection. AND we finally got to hear her planned final 4 words, which I will go into detail much later. (I love the fact that the final four words are going to get their entire paragraph. An entire paragraph for just 4 words. Man, this show guys!)
So the episode started off a little rough, with Rory doing a whole montage with the life and death brigade. Was it pretty? Sure. Was it needed to give Logan a send off and Rory closure, yes and no. The life and death brigade stuff sure, the montage itself no. I'm not a fan of montages honestly, and I definitely felt like it was out of place in this show, that doesn't ever do montages, and this episode had two! Give me back my "la la la la"s and guitar strums, you can keep your over the top montage to a Beatles song. The montage didn't help, but I hate the Life and Death Brigade. I know they were a big part of her story but I fucking hate them. I don't mind the fact that they are drunk all the time, that's just being rich and young (or I guess old) but I hate the waste of excessive wealth and Rory's compliance with it. To me, between her sleeping with Dean when he was married and then onto Logan and his richboy antics, that's when Rory slipped from mildly annoying to unbearable. Though again, I didn't think she could get any worse, until this season happened and I was actually surprised by that. Though, for me at least, this episode undid some of the damage to Rory's character that Daniel's previous episodes did. Even with her super awkward tangoing during her romp with the Brigade. Whose idea was to let that happen? I'd like to write them a letter for being personally victimized by seeing the most ungraceful and awkward girl in the world tango.
So I'm going to go ahead and get the whole discussion of the last 4 words out of the way. Amy Sherman-Palladino had said many moons ago that she had planned the last 4 words, I think maybe way back in season 1? It was a long time ago. I liked the last 4 words, though as long as they weren't like "you're in purgatory Rory" or "its only a dream" or something like that (Lost has pretty much lowered the bar for me on acceptable series finales. Fuck that show), I was going to be happy with the last 4 words. So when I heard "Mom?" "Yeah?" "I'm pregnant." I was initially gobsmacked and shocked, I did not see that coming! But thinking about it, how did I NOT see that coming? I think it's a perfect ending. To me, it's not open ended at all. In the very first episode of the very first season, Luke says something like "you're going to turn out just like your mother" and Rory says "too late". They literally told us right from the beginning what to expect. So she's not exactly like her mother, she didn't get pregnant at 16 but she is the same age Lorelai was at the beginning of the show, how's that for symmetry? And she's going to make the same decision that her mother did, to raise her daughter (because it's GOING to be a girl, Gilmore women can will that shit into action) on her own and bring her up in a magical world with a super special friendship relationship. We don't need another season to find out what Rory does or what will happen, we just watched 7 seasons and 4 mini movies about what will happen, we already know guys! (And Logan, the Christopher surrogate, is obviously the father and anyone who suggests differently hasn't been watching this show. It isn't Maury, it's Gilmore Girls, and Logan is Rory's baby daddy. Do not come at me with that fucking bullshit.)
This episode had so many great scenes, I'm going to say this again but it's shocking to go from Summer to Fall, where the last episode had 17 minutes of bullshit filler to this episode jampacked with fantastic scenes all crafted with care. The first scene that really blew me away was Lorelai calling Emily from that mountain top and telling her a happy story between her and Richard. One thing, I was glad I didn't have to watch Lorelai camp and hike because that seemed like that would cause me to hyperventilate from anxiety. But the story was cute and nice and I'm glad Emily finally got to hear her daughter say something nice about her father. Also, I didn't want Lorelai to go camping because I just wanted her to go home to Luke and FIX THINGS! You guys are soup snakes! So she figures out what she needed to figure out and goes home and Luke goes off like girl, me and you are it, we are it and the only way out is in a body bag (the most romantic thing I have ever heard!!) and Lorelai is like no shit, that's why I just planned our wedding and they finally fix their awkwardness and they are good again and the whole world rejoiced!
I said that this episode undid a lot of my hatred of Rory so let me expand on that. It almost felt like her head was reset to a previous setting and they removed the most recent update. Logan offers her his house to write her book in and she refuses because she knows just where she's going to write... in Richard's office!! I legitimately teared up at that, I always loved their closeness and that seems like a thing that early season Rory would do, not this later season/mini movie version of bullshit Rory. I know it's such a stupid, simple thing but think about how much Rory has changed since the beginning of the show. But for me, the most important scene, possibly my favorite scene in the entire series, is the confrontation between Rory and her dad. I was going to post a video of that scene here for you all to watch but it's not on youtube WHICH IS BULLSHIT. You know how previously I said that there wasn't enough story and that there was all this filler garbage, well the scene between Rory and Christopher is decidedly NOT that. That is a scene that was carefully planned, written out with a ton of forethought, for maybe years, probably however long she had those final 4 words planned. The hesitation, the slight accusations, the weighted words, all executed perfectly and really brought home that emotional punch at the end when you really realize why she's there. At first it seems like it's just about the book, and reflecting on her life and the gaps left behind from her father not being a part of it, and I loved that scene even when I thought it was only about that. But then you realize, it's her being old school Rory and making an internal list, pros and cons of keeping Logan in the loop, gathering every bit of information before she can decide what she wants to do. That, to me, is just heartbreaking. I think she's just so much more bearable because she stops thinking "me, me, me" and realizes that the sun does not revolve around her afterall.
OKAY SO the next scene I'd like to talk about I'm going to post first because it is goddamn glorious:
So the best kind of Emily Gilmore is Petty Emily Gilmore and here she is in all her glory. It's not the pettiest she's ever been (that's the attack on Logan's mom, straight fucking savage) but it's my favorite outburst from her ever. She is listening to all this BULLSHIT and just straight stands up like fuck it, I want a cookie, and then when she can't stand it any more, she calls her friends out on being fake as shit and put everything out on the table. It's fucking great. And when they start playing that fake ass shit with her, she's like don't be a pussy and say this shit to my face. So they say it to her face. She straight peaces out, like fuck if I care, this shit was my past life when I had any fucks left to give. And that part broke my heart, the "this is all dead to me, it died with Richard". She demanded to go first! Her whole struggle with trying to find a life to lead when half of her is gone is just so heartbreaking. But find it she does, eventually. She kicks out Laura Palmer's dad and becomes a whaling expert or something and just scares children with gory stories, which honestly I think is what she was meant to do all her life.
So a big thing too was symmetry and I love, love, LOVED it. So I've already said there's the whole Rory mirroring Lorelei's life with raising a babygirl all on her own from a rich baby daddy (aka Logan aka Christopher) but there's more than that. For one, WE FINALLY HEAR THE SONG, and thank the good Lord, if I've said it once, I've said it 1 million times, Gilmore Girls has the best theme song and it was wrong we were robbed of it for these little movies. But we finally got it at the end, to close out the entire series and I suppose that's all that matters huh? Another point of symmetry is Lorelei asking Emily for money, this time for expanding the inn, and she has pretty much the same exact conversation as the first episode. Almost word for word! I loved that. I love symmetry in my media, whether it's movies, TV, or books, so long as it's done well. Harry Potter did it extremely well (Books 1&7, 2&6, 3&5 are all similar dealing with specific character arcs or plot points that are introduced and concluded with the opposite book, like Sirius was introduced in book 3 and savagely murdered in book 5. Spoiler alert? The book was released 15 years ago and the movie 11, so no, not gonna apologize for that one) and I think Gilmore girls did it well too, if only because this episode was so carefully planned and written from the get-go, no filler in this one.
So I haven't addressed it yet but Sookie was sorely missed. Maybe that's why we had to wade through 17 fucking minutes of pointless musical bull shit (I will never let that go, not even if you make me go to therapy with the girls and therapist Claudia, that one is staying with me forever) because they needed something for Lorelei to do/someone to interact with that wasn't Rory, Emily, or Luke. She was at the Inn yes and she spoke with Michel sometimes but it's unrealistic for her to spend a good deal of time with him because of who they are as people just in general. So I guess that's why she has all the extra stupid not charming interactions with the townsfolk. But heaven almighty, the one scene they finally did get together made me tear up (which, okay, isn't difficult to do but still). Maybe it's because I missed Sookie so much, maybe it's because Melissa McCarthy is a goddamn national TREASURE! Either way, thank you goddess McCarthy for coming back even if it was just for 1 scene!!!
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SOOOOOOO I started writing this post like 7 months ago and I had like 3/4ths of it done and just never finished because my summer was absolutely insanely busy (and insanely fun!). So this year I'm going to try to write more often again, I know I've made promises before but I mean it this time baby. I'll probably write about the new Black Mirror episodes next (I haven't watched them yet, I'm waiting for the right mindset to not completely crumble into a nihilistic rage) and then maybe jessica jones and luke cage (I've been singing that tune for a while guys, haven't I?), and the handmaid's tale. So happy things to come. Thanks for sticking with me guys (anyone?), I'll try not to let you down again!
So I watched CSI and I won't be writing about it but real quick, let me drop a few lines, The first couple seasons? Solid. Grissom is the best to watch, even if he does have some stupid side story with the most annoying character on the show (Sara Sidle) but then Warrick dies and Grissom leaves, and Morpheus steps in but he cannot fill the Grissom shaped void left behind and the show really was not that enjoyable to watch any more. I wanted to get at least as far as Ted Danzen because I heard he was on there and I really like him so I wanted to check it out and boy, I was not disappointed! He was exactly the jolt that show needed to continue. Him and Elizabeth Shue were a complete joy to watch and I easily made it through the last couple seasons without any more pain. Sorry Morpheus.
OKAY BACK TO MY GIRLS...
So I'm only writing about the new Netflix season that was released last November, the previous 7 seasons are just too much for me to write about. I watched it when it aired originally (up until season 4 or maybe 5) and so my thoughts on the show are all garbled with my adolescent hormonal craziness and can't be considered reliable or coherent. I was a mess back then (lol back then, like I'm not a mess now, I just watched 15 seasons of CSI, I shouldn't be trusted to make any decisions anymore). I watched the new season/movie/reboot A Year in the Life when it first aired and then rewatched it while writing it because honestly besides a handful of things, I really didn't remember it. My brain is like a DVR completely full of CSI episodes, I have no room in there anymore outside my murder degree. Anyways as I've spent the last 15 years in love with the girls and I've watched the original show easily 6 or 7 times, I'm going to give them the time and respect they deserve and do each episode individually. This is gonna be a long one guys, you might want to settle in.
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| My BFF and I tried to do our girls proud with our binge watching snacks (chinese food, chips and dip, and candy. no coffee because we're fucking amateurs). |
IT SHOULD GO WITHOUT SAYING BUT SPOILERS AHEAD
WINTER
First things first, where the FUCK was the opening credits? The little voice over of little moments from the TV show was cute but GG has the best opening credits. Nowadays TV shows don't even have theme songs or opening credits so I was really looking forward to these, and it's weird that they didn't have that with this reboot. It always got me amped, I sang with it every time (where you leeeeead, I will follow) and it didn't truly feel like GG started without Carole King's voice crooning to me. (Also, the little voiceover of all the moments from the show was very reminiscent of the Veronica Mars movie, I wonder if they took that idea and ran with it) Okay so as much as I bitched that there's no opening credit song, no Carole King, the last little voiceover moment from the series before the word "Winter" popped up on the screen, "I smell snow..." gave me goosebumps.
What I loved right from the beginning is that there was no easing back into the show. The first scene is the girls, meeting up at the gazebo and a mile per minute bantering and when Rory takes a deep breath at the end of it and says "that felt good", she took the words right out of my mouth. My girls are back, oh how I've missed them!
And oh how I've missed Stars Hollow! (PS is it just me or is Mainstrasse just a trashy version of Stars Hollow, with you know, more heroin? I think it's because of the little twinkle lights) It was nice to see some familiar faces too, Miss Patty, Kirk, the town troubadour, shit (and I'm going to get some flack for this) but even Lorelai's ex Jason Stiles. And his entry into the show was not contrived or forced at all, she ran into him at her father's funeral and had some quick banter with Lorelai and went on his way. It was organic and I didn't mind it. Something I didn't fucking care for was the whole "Ooober" thing with Kirk. I get it, Kirk's weird and he does weird shit and yes he'd probably do that but why did it go on for so long and why did everyone have to keep saying it? Whenever everything else seemed so effortless being dropped in (what Rory has been up to, her living situation, Lorelai and Luke's relationship, the whole town tour), Kirk constantly bringing up his fucking annoying fake car thing was just a little jarring. We get it, it's 2016 now and it's like Uber but it's Kirk, just stop okay?
But let's talk about the real gem of the show, the other Gilmore girl who doesn't quite get enough love, if you ask me, Emily Gilmore. Boy has she changed and yet she hasn't? Well one thing that's different is the fact that she has the same maid for the entire series, and not just that, she pretty much just adopts the whole family. Also, she's mad at Lorelai, that's not new, but it's a justifiable anger and that's kinda new. Lorelai was fucking selfish and mean and Emily has no fucking time to sugar coat it anymore (lol like she ever did before?). She just straight called her out on all her bulldozing ways, Lorelai has to get her own way or she won't fucking do it at all, and that's always been a flaw of hers. It was harder to see in the earlier seasons of the show because she struggled so much but as she started to succeed and achieve her goals, like opening the inn and having more money, her lack of compromise with Luke or with Rory or with Emily seemed incredibly childish and dickish. Thank God for Emily dropping some truths on her. I especially liked how she was telling Lorelai like oh go back to your weird little town where you're so beloved and tell everyone how I'm such a bitch and you've been so wronged. And yeah, that's kinda how Lorelai is. Don't get me wrong, I fucking love Lorelai but she definitely lives in this little bubble where she's perfect and everyone who is mean to her is the devil. It's a character flaw, it's frustrating, but it's nice that it's being called out on. Then the goddess known as Emily Gilmore goes even further to be like WTF Rory? Why are you being an irresponsible piece of shit? And girlfriend only knew the half of it...
Because not only has Rory leveled up in being obnoxious but she's like just a downright shitty person. Cheating on Paul (Pete? Pablo? I kind of love the joke that no one remembers him) with the shittiest bag of all shit bags, Logan Huntzberger. I hate Logan and not just because, gun to my head, if I had to choose I'd choose "Team Jess" but because of all the shitty things he's said and done to her and it's fucking frustrating to see someone actively choose shitty people in their life. I know he was written in to be a reflection of Lorelai and Christopher's relationship (more on that later) but for all his faults, Christopher was an absent father yes, but he wasn't actively shitty to Lorelai. I think it's a flawed comparison. Anyways, so what shitty thing does Logan do to Rory? It's a quick remark but it reminded me of when Rory dropped out of Yale and he said oh my father doesn't know how to treat people and he shouldn't have said those things to you. He never defended her or supported her or told her she was a great writer and fuck his father for saying anything otherwise. Maybe she's not a great writer and his father was right, fuck if I know, but your boyfriend should be behind you 100%. He took it that her feelings were hurt by his father and he didn't like that, sure that's fine, but the thing is that it's bigger than that. Her whole fucking life goals were shot down right in front of her. He should've been more like fuck my father's opinion, you're talented, you will be able to find a way to do what you want, you'll get through this because you're smart and driven. But he didn't say that and he totally enabled her to almost throw everything she worked for away because he's an uncaring piece of shit. ANYWAYS so along those same lines he says something to her when they're in his apartment in London about how she's a great writer and she goes oh you must be in a good mood. Like he normally doesn't tell her she's a great writer or encourage her goals in life and the fact that he did means that he's in a good mood. Yeahhhh... so he's still an unsupportive twatwaffle. Go figure. But damn, he's a fine looking unsupportive twatwaffle. I didn't see it before but I see it now, the past 10 years have been kind to you Logan Huntzberger.
Also, is it just me or is Lane living in Sookie's old house?? Because that's pretty fucking meta.
SPRING
So Spring was definitely a step back after a strong debut after, what was it, 10 years? Though it did introduce some good storylines, it introduced some of the worst storylines so there's that too. I think it's because ONE person (Ahem, Amy) was much better writing the characters than another person (I'm talking about you, Daniel...). Where the first episode mostly caught us up on where the characters were after all these years apart from us, this episode mostly gets the plot into motion, kind of. There were parts that were too long, that should've been edited either out or down and because they weren't it was weird and awkward. I'm specifically thinking of the town hall meeting. Normally those meetings are pretty short (from what we see) and relate to the plot in some way and this time it just seemed to be like oh hey, isn't Taylor goofy? So is Babette, and the newspaper stand guy, what a wacky group of people we got here, aren't we just quirky?? I think maybe 4 hour and half long episodes may have been too much, it seems like they didn't have enough story to cover all of it or maybe they did, but they couldn't get the required actors for that story for enough time to actually tell it and so there's these scenes that are just there and have no real purpose.
So first, let me get my Rory rant out of the way. It's so hard to be sympathetic to her. She's become this completely unlikable character, completely unrecognizable from the beginning of the show. Don't get me wrong, she was always a little terrible but that has grown exponentially. Remember when her and Dean broke up the first time and she refused to cry and get upset about it until that party and her mom found her on the couch with a gallon of ice cream like I'm ready to wallow now? My heart went out to that girl, then she became the girl that slept with a married man and then the girl who throws away her entire life because one person didn't fall down and worship at her feet, and now? Now she's the girl sleeping with another girl's fiance, while she has a dude, and thinks the world still owes her everything. Her book with River Song falls through, she tries halfheartedly to do a story for a big publishing company who are giving her a chance, and then she shows up completely unprepared for an interview for some up and coming blog-news-trend-website-thing and dismayed that they expected her to impress THEM. Didn't they know? She's Rory fucking Gilmore, she wrote one article for the New Yorker one time and she EXPECTED this job. How dare they get HER hopes up! She didn't even want this crap level job in the first place, she was LOWERING herself to them, mere mortals. You know I almost felt sorry for her when she was freaking out after having sex with the wookie (OH and shut up about how terrible it is that he was dressed up like a wookie, not every person you sleep with can be the heir to a newspaper fortune, you princess bitch), even though she cheated on her forgettable boyfriend AGAIN, the whole "I'm drowning, I'm not as successful as I want to be, my life isn't going the way I planned, I can't hold it all together anymore" feeling she has is super relateable. I've been there. I get that. So I almost felt sorry for her, until immediately after that she goes on that interview and just becomes the embodiment of every negative millenial article ever. Man, fuck her and her entitled ass.
One thing I did like, though I thought it could've been done better, was the whole therapy storyline with Lorelai and Emily. If there's any two people in the world that need therapy, it's those bitches. But it was dropped kind of suddenly, after teasing us with THAT LETTER, the horrible letter that Emily says that Lorelai sent her and never spoken of again. WTF was in that letter? What was the point of bringing UP the letter if you were never going to explain it? That's some half assed writing if you ask me. And then to have Lorelai lie about going to therapy to Luke seemed really out of character. Well for now-Lorelai. Past-Lorelai probably would've lied because she was always weird about stuff but this Lorelai, she's been in this relationship with Luke now for 9 years and you can't be doing that AND lying about shit. So it just seemed weird. And I didn't understand why they just dropped the whole thing so quickly, that could've been the new "Friday night dinner" thing and gone on for the rest of the episodes, "Tuesday morning therapy" (Jesus, those ladies reeeeally need it too). I just felt like that was such a rich opportunity to explore their relationship outside of the OMG you had a baby at 16 (which when Emily brought that up in therapy, I was like are you fucking kidding me? Get a new fucking song- that was directed at the writers, not our goddess Emily). But I suppose this is all about these 3 ladies all going on their independent journeys and finding strength alone so they can support each other. Or some shit.
I liked this whole storyline too with Lorelai and Michel and the inn and possibly him growing out of it and maybe her growing out of it. That's what made her open up the Dragonfly Inn in the first place, she outgrew that other inn whose name I'm blanking on and I realize I can just google it but I don't feel like it but it burnt down and you know the one. She took on opening her own business and succeeded and needs a new challenge, so I thought that was a welcome new storyline and I was really excited to see where it goes from here.
Another shining moment in this episode was our lord and savior, Paris Gellar. She is dressed to kill and when she slammed the door shut with her high heeled foot, I decided to name my first born after her. No regrets, girlfriend has flawless hair. Can I please just be her?
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| LEGENDARY |
SUMMER
So we've never really seen summer in Stars Hollow and the reason for that is because Stars Hollow in the summer fucking sucks, or at least Daniel Palladino's interpretation of it does. This episode was on season 7 level terribleness, and not the episode where Luke punches Chris in the face, more like Lorelai gets married in Paris or her singing Whitney Houston. I know that's a big accusation but it's just how I feel in my heart, I'm not going to have a lot of nice things to say about this one guys.
Well let's just jump right into the mini musical nightmare we experienced. They literally played 4 complete songs, totaling 10 minutes of just straight musical, nothing adding to the plot, just Stars Hollow people being fucking wAcKy. That does NOT include the 7 minutes discussing the musical, and making a pledge, and the whole joke that everyone loves it but Lorelai didn't. OH and Carole King got up and sang this song that she wrote and everyone is like no that's not good, GET IT?? Because Carole King is a REAL artist and that song IS good so everyone IS DUMB for liking the musical. I literally kept track of how long the whole thing was because I remember thinking the first time I watched it "OMG this won't end, please tell me this is ending, how is this still going on, am I dead, is this purgatory, no this must be hell, how is this still going on?" I thought maybe I was being dramatic and it was only like 3 minutes long. So the little pledge beforehand started at minute 37, the first song started at minute 39, the last part of the musical ended at minute 49, and then they discussed it until minute 54. I'm not being dramatic, that was 17 minutes of complete nonsense. This is EXACTLY what I was talking about before about them either not having enough story to fill up all these episodes or having to substitute filler shit like this because they couldn't get the actors for the story. I genuinely hope to God it's the latter because I know it was difficult to get all these people back together with all their various projects etc but it very well may be the former. That depresses me. But I guess some may argue that the musical was necessary because it was the new song at the end (that song is not included with the original 17 minutes, mind you) that was the catalyst for Lorelai's decision to do "Wild" (the book, not the movie). I don't think that excuses 17 minutes of nonsense. That could've EASILY been edited down. There was just not enough story, ugh.
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| Me during the musical |
So onto Rory and her obnoxious entitled piece of shit ass. She's just a wreck right now and anytime someone tries to throw her a bone she bites their head off because she's just so much above everyone. The Stars Hollow Gazette is closing down because print is dead and so is the former editor or something and Rory is aghast! So she begrudgingly signs up to keep it running and pretty much sulks the whole time. Didn't you guys know, she got a journalism degree from YALE, she writes REAL articles about REAL things and fuck us if we don't get it. And for someone who previously ran a paper before and is crazy organized, she was a fucking disaster. Not realizing that someone would need to deliver the papers? Has her head gotten so big that she forgets the most basic things? Has her love affair with Logan, heir to a newspaper empire, made her completely disassociate that there are other people in the newspaper business who matter too, like the fucking paperboy? And yes, what about Logan? She freaks out because his FIANCE moved in with him and she's supposed to visit but now she has to stay in a hotel like a proper slutfaced mistress. Meanwhile, she's still dating what's his face but yet she's all mad because Logan is with another girl. How dare he be with his fiance, I'm perfect Rory! I can treat people like shit but they can't treat me that way! Now, I know it's more complicated than that, that their relationship has spanned years and there is a lot of complex feelings there but there is right and there is wrong. Both of them are acting like shitbags, hey! Maybe they do deserve each other! Sensing Rory is making bad life decisions, Jess enters stage right. He pops in and steers her into an idea that actually captivates her. Steer isn't the right word, more like straight up told her what to do. Jess is like why don't you write something that you do care about, what's the most important thing about you, what has shaped you as a person, Rory sits there crosseyed and drooling like I dunno Jess I'm a big dum dum what should I write about? And Jess is like you and your mom, it should start when you are 16 and span 7 years and then jump up to present day, how about this for a name "Gilmore Girls"? This big push from Jess really solidifies to me that while Logan is supposed to be Rory's Christopher, Jess is her Luke (though NO ONE IS LUKE BUT LUKE OKAY?). And while like I said earlier, gun to my head, I'm #TeamJess, I didn't care for the fact that Jess told her what to write. I mean, is she that dense that she couldn't think of it herself? SHE WENT TO YALE. So she brings the idea to Lorelai and thus begins the biggest, childish fight either of them have ever had, and that is definitely saying something.
(Though real quick before I move on to Lorelai, let me rant about the stupid fucking 30 something club. For one, it was annoying. For two, did Daniel Palladino just read a bunch of articles about negative stereotypes about millenials and then write this show? He seems to have some deep seated hatred towards my generation. "Oh they move back home and go bowling and love EVERYTHING by Paul Thomas Anderson, and they all have moustaches and are completely interchangeable and their mommies have to hold their hand and check their resume because the big bad world out there is just so so scary". I mean he's really the one that doubled down on making Rory the fucking most miserable priviledged bitch on the entire east coast. That's quite an accomplishment. I mean seriously, what underemployed 30 something at Starbucks shit in his coffee?)
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| Well fuck me, I guess |
Where was I? Oh Lorelai and Rory fighting in the graveyard. So... that was weird. It seemed really kinda random. Like Lorelai is really going to get that bent out of shape because Rory wants to write a book about their life together? First off, Rory hasn't completed a single thing yet so who's to say that she would even complete the book in the first place? And if she does complete it, maybe no one will publish it. And if it is published, that doesn't mean anyone will read it. I mean shit, they are all just assuming this is going to be some instant best seller aren't they? And she's always been so proud of their life together and the world that she brought her daughter up in, this need for super duper privacy is just... random. She's like I've always been very protective of what I tell people about myself. Nooo you are protective of what you tell your mom. You pretty much tell everyone else anything. In fact, that was a constant plot driver in the series, you telling strangers all about your life and your mom finding your shit out from a third party. That was like the plot of a fourth of the episodes, so I really just didn't get the whole fight. Maybe someone else can explain it to me better. Maybe I'm the dum dum. And Lorelai is being a total unsupportive bitch to her mom. I get it, her mom is hard on her and she can be difficult to love but Lorelai does love her so why is she being so shitty? Emily is sleeping in until noon, staying home, not doing anything, clearly going through a hard time and the only person helping her out is the Gypsy-maid and her family (oh the irony.... wait is that irony? I don't think I ever really understood what irony was. Is that ironic? Is ironic even a word, it looks weird now that I've typed it. Anyways...). Also, it really didn't seem like Lorelai to hate on Emily for maybe finding a new dude. I mean, I do get it, it's her mom and she had been with her dad for 50 years, but remember the episode where they wore the Dirty Trollop lipstick? Did Daniel Palladino even watch this show?
Here's a last few random thoughts, I kinda love Luke being a lifeguard and OF COURSE he kicked everyone out of the pool for not following the rules, Luke is so great! Michel leaving is very sad but understandable and I like that whole storyline and that upheaval for Lorelai but I shall miss him. I hated the secret bar, that was fucking stupid. It felt like that was created entirely just so Lorelai and Michel would have a place to have that conversation. Stars Hollow would never have a secret bar!
FALL
How the hell did we go from Summer, one of the worst episodes in the entire series, to Fall, one of the best? I'll tell you how, it's Amy Sherman-Palladino. She IS Gilmore Girls. She wrapped up these 4 mini movies-TV series, just perfection. AND we finally got to hear her planned final 4 words, which I will go into detail much later. (I love the fact that the final four words are going to get their entire paragraph. An entire paragraph for just 4 words. Man, this show guys!)
So the episode started off a little rough, with Rory doing a whole montage with the life and death brigade. Was it pretty? Sure. Was it needed to give Logan a send off and Rory closure, yes and no. The life and death brigade stuff sure, the montage itself no. I'm not a fan of montages honestly, and I definitely felt like it was out of place in this show, that doesn't ever do montages, and this episode had two! Give me back my "la la la la"s and guitar strums, you can keep your over the top montage to a Beatles song. The montage didn't help, but I hate the Life and Death Brigade. I know they were a big part of her story but I fucking hate them. I don't mind the fact that they are drunk all the time, that's just being rich and young (or I guess old) but I hate the waste of excessive wealth and Rory's compliance with it. To me, between her sleeping with Dean when he was married and then onto Logan and his richboy antics, that's when Rory slipped from mildly annoying to unbearable. Though again, I didn't think she could get any worse, until this season happened and I was actually surprised by that. Though, for me at least, this episode undid some of the damage to Rory's character that Daniel's previous episodes did. Even with her super awkward tangoing during her romp with the Brigade. Whose idea was to let that happen? I'd like to write them a letter for being personally victimized by seeing the most ungraceful and awkward girl in the world tango.
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| That's it. That's the show. |
So I'm going to go ahead and get the whole discussion of the last 4 words out of the way. Amy Sherman-Palladino had said many moons ago that she had planned the last 4 words, I think maybe way back in season 1? It was a long time ago. I liked the last 4 words, though as long as they weren't like "you're in purgatory Rory" or "its only a dream" or something like that (Lost has pretty much lowered the bar for me on acceptable series finales. Fuck that show), I was going to be happy with the last 4 words. So when I heard "Mom?" "Yeah?" "I'm pregnant." I was initially gobsmacked and shocked, I did not see that coming! But thinking about it, how did I NOT see that coming? I think it's a perfect ending. To me, it's not open ended at all. In the very first episode of the very first season, Luke says something like "you're going to turn out just like your mother" and Rory says "too late". They literally told us right from the beginning what to expect. So she's not exactly like her mother, she didn't get pregnant at 16 but she is the same age Lorelai was at the beginning of the show, how's that for symmetry? And she's going to make the same decision that her mother did, to raise her daughter (because it's GOING to be a girl, Gilmore women can will that shit into action) on her own and bring her up in a magical world with a super special friendship relationship. We don't need another season to find out what Rory does or what will happen, we just watched 7 seasons and 4 mini movies about what will happen, we already know guys! (And Logan, the Christopher surrogate, is obviously the father and anyone who suggests differently hasn't been watching this show. It isn't Maury, it's Gilmore Girls, and Logan is Rory's baby daddy. Do not come at me with that fucking bullshit.)
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| Sayeth Queen E, so it shall be |
This episode had so many great scenes, I'm going to say this again but it's shocking to go from Summer to Fall, where the last episode had 17 minutes of bullshit filler to this episode jampacked with fantastic scenes all crafted with care. The first scene that really blew me away was Lorelai calling Emily from that mountain top and telling her a happy story between her and Richard. One thing, I was glad I didn't have to watch Lorelai camp and hike because that seemed like that would cause me to hyperventilate from anxiety. But the story was cute and nice and I'm glad Emily finally got to hear her daughter say something nice about her father. Also, I didn't want Lorelai to go camping because I just wanted her to go home to Luke and FIX THINGS! You guys are soup snakes! So she figures out what she needed to figure out and goes home and Luke goes off like girl, me and you are it, we are it and the only way out is in a body bag (the most romantic thing I have ever heard!!) and Lorelai is like no shit, that's why I just planned our wedding and they finally fix their awkwardness and they are good again and the whole world rejoiced!
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| The most romantic proposal there ever was |
I said that this episode undid a lot of my hatred of Rory so let me expand on that. It almost felt like her head was reset to a previous setting and they removed the most recent update. Logan offers her his house to write her book in and she refuses because she knows just where she's going to write... in Richard's office!! I legitimately teared up at that, I always loved their closeness and that seems like a thing that early season Rory would do, not this later season/mini movie version of bullshit Rory. I know it's such a stupid, simple thing but think about how much Rory has changed since the beginning of the show. But for me, the most important scene, possibly my favorite scene in the entire series, is the confrontation between Rory and her dad. I was going to post a video of that scene here for you all to watch but it's not on youtube WHICH IS BULLSHIT. You know how previously I said that there wasn't enough story and that there was all this filler garbage, well the scene between Rory and Christopher is decidedly NOT that. That is a scene that was carefully planned, written out with a ton of forethought, for maybe years, probably however long she had those final 4 words planned. The hesitation, the slight accusations, the weighted words, all executed perfectly and really brought home that emotional punch at the end when you really realize why she's there. At first it seems like it's just about the book, and reflecting on her life and the gaps left behind from her father not being a part of it, and I loved that scene even when I thought it was only about that. But then you realize, it's her being old school Rory and making an internal list, pros and cons of keeping Logan in the loop, gathering every bit of information before she can decide what she wants to do. That, to me, is just heartbreaking. I think she's just so much more bearable because she stops thinking "me, me, me" and realizes that the sun does not revolve around her afterall.
OKAY SO the next scene I'd like to talk about I'm going to post first because it is goddamn glorious:
So the best kind of Emily Gilmore is Petty Emily Gilmore and here she is in all her glory. It's not the pettiest she's ever been (that's the attack on Logan's mom, straight fucking savage) but it's my favorite outburst from her ever. She is listening to all this BULLSHIT and just straight stands up like fuck it, I want a cookie, and then when she can't stand it any more, she calls her friends out on being fake as shit and put everything out on the table. It's fucking great. And when they start playing that fake ass shit with her, she's like don't be a pussy and say this shit to my face. So they say it to her face. She straight peaces out, like fuck if I care, this shit was my past life when I had any fucks left to give. And that part broke my heart, the "this is all dead to me, it died with Richard". She demanded to go first! Her whole struggle with trying to find a life to lead when half of her is gone is just so heartbreaking. But find it she does, eventually. She kicks out Laura Palmer's dad and becomes a whaling expert or something and just scares children with gory stories, which honestly I think is what she was meant to do all her life.
So a big thing too was symmetry and I love, love, LOVED it. So I've already said there's the whole Rory mirroring Lorelei's life with raising a babygirl all on her own from a rich baby daddy (aka Logan aka Christopher) but there's more than that. For one, WE FINALLY HEAR THE SONG, and thank the good Lord, if I've said it once, I've said it 1 million times, Gilmore Girls has the best theme song and it was wrong we were robbed of it for these little movies. But we finally got it at the end, to close out the entire series and I suppose that's all that matters huh? Another point of symmetry is Lorelei asking Emily for money, this time for expanding the inn, and she has pretty much the same exact conversation as the first episode. Almost word for word! I loved that. I love symmetry in my media, whether it's movies, TV, or books, so long as it's done well. Harry Potter did it extremely well (Books 1&7, 2&6, 3&5 are all similar dealing with specific character arcs or plot points that are introduced and concluded with the opposite book, like Sirius was introduced in book 3 and savagely murdered in book 5. Spoiler alert? The book was released 15 years ago and the movie 11, so no, not gonna apologize for that one) and I think Gilmore girls did it well too, if only because this episode was so carefully planned and written from the get-go, no filler in this one.
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| My feelings on Sookie being in only one scene |
So I haven't addressed it yet but Sookie was sorely missed. Maybe that's why we had to wade through 17 fucking minutes of pointless musical bull shit (I will never let that go, not even if you make me go to therapy with the girls and therapist Claudia, that one is staying with me forever) because they needed something for Lorelei to do/someone to interact with that wasn't Rory, Emily, or Luke. She was at the Inn yes and she spoke with Michel sometimes but it's unrealistic for her to spend a good deal of time with him because of who they are as people just in general. So I guess that's why she has all the extra stupid not charming interactions with the townsfolk. But heaven almighty, the one scene they finally did get together made me tear up (which, okay, isn't difficult to do but still). Maybe it's because I missed Sookie so much, maybe it's because Melissa McCarthy is a goddamn national TREASURE! Either way, thank you goddess McCarthy for coming back even if it was just for 1 scene!!!
So.... for my overall thoughts....
I liked it. There were times when I looooved it and there were times when I hated it. But my girls finally got the finale they deserved, the rest of their story told. Lorelei and Luke finally got hitched, Lorelei is growing even more in her professional life, and Rory and Emily found some meaning in their life outside of the men in their life. I can't stress how much I loved those last 4 words, how this world continues to turn. I may have focused on the things I didn't like so much but that's just because it's so much fun to rage-write all my grievances (another to add to the list, the super random awkward interaction with Dean for no real purpose outside of having a cameo for casting's sake) but despite my rage-writing above, this was a terrific send off to a fun and witty show and I'm so happy we finally got it. Black Mirror got it wrong, sometimes technology isn't the worse thing ever, sometimes Netflix brings you 4 mini-Gilmore-Girls-movies and you finally get some closure.
SOOOOOOO I started writing this post like 7 months ago and I had like 3/4ths of it done and just never finished because my summer was absolutely insanely busy (and insanely fun!). So this year I'm going to try to write more often again, I know I've made promises before but I mean it this time baby. I'll probably write about the new Black Mirror episodes next (I haven't watched them yet, I'm waiting for the right mindset to not completely crumble into a nihilistic rage) and then maybe jessica jones and luke cage (I've been singing that tune for a while guys, haven't I?), and the handmaid's tale. So happy things to come. Thanks for sticking with me guys (anyone?), I'll try not to let you down again!
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